Thursday, June 16, 2011

update on my cycle/anti depressants

I have been on BCP for two full weeks now. The first week was terrible. I don’t understand, because I took BCP for 8 years and had no problems. But I guess getting adjusted to it is the hard part, because I was so hormonal last week I couldn’t stand it. It was worse than anything I experienced on clomid.

That seems to have resolved itself but now I have unpleasant physical side effects. My acne is worse than it has ever been and my hair is falling out in handfuls (literally). 

I am still going back and forth between excitement and stress. My support group met this week and while we are supposed to be supporting each other, they kind of made me want to turn and run the other direction.

I have worked my butt off to lose 10 pounds in three months and my pants have been delightfully baggy, but I know that by the end of the IVF cycle I’ll be giant again. I know it’s shallow but I’m not looking forward to the bloating. It is really going to throw a wrench in my self-esteem, which is already suffering because of the acne.

I haven’t said much here about antidepressants. Now that I have been on 150mg of Welbutrin for two months I can say that they have helped. I still have conflicting feelings on the medicine and I haven’t told anyone that I’m taking them besides A. 

My depression isn’t the kind where I can’t get out of bed in the morning or I weep every day. The main reason I knew I needed help was actually work. My work performance started really suffering. I didn’t have the energy to do my tasks as well as I used to, or even at all. 

That changed almost immediately after going on Welbutrin. Obviously, I’m not happy all the time. And it’s not a miracle drug. And I have to stop it once I get pregnant. But I think I made the right choice.

I start Lupron on 6/28 and take my last BCP on 7/5. I’m trying to decide when to stop drinking. Obviously after the transfer. But should I stop when I start stims? Or when I start Lupron? Or now? I only have one drink every now and then but I don’t want to give it up before I have to. I also need to ask the nurses when to stop going to the gym.

Hope everyone is doing well!


Drevas said...

Hi Lulu! So sorry you are having such a hard time with the BCP's! Hopefully the next two weeks will go by quickly and then you can ditch them for good! Glad that the anti-depressants are working well for you though.

For my fresh IVF cycle, I stopped drinking alchohol/caffine when I started my stims. I continued walking/elliptical up until the embryo transfer.

Thinking of you and praying that this cycle will be the key to your success... you deserve it!

Alex said...

Ugh - going on BCP is the worst! And hair loss? Sounds awful! I'm glad the Welbutrin has been helping you - I see nothing wrong in getting a little medical aid every once in awhile.

Regarding drinking, there are varying opinions on this one. I wouldn't have more than one drink when I started stims, and I think that was only a couple times. It was nice to have my last glass of wine, hopefully for a long time - make an event of it! And I exercised until my body told me to stop, which was a couple days into stimming. Suddenly I could feel my ovaries move when I moved, and that didn't feel too good...

Kat said...

Hi Lulu! I'm returning your visit.

I really hate BCP. I was on them on and off when I was in my early 20s. I tried 3 different types and they all made me feel awful. By the time I met my husband we just used condoms for years.

I hope starting the Lupron goes OK for you. I'm on a short protocol cycle and to be honest I was really relieved to avoid the down-regging stage. I guess I'll have to see how I respond before I say that for sure though!

S said...

Hi, here from cyclesista.

Regarding when to give up drinking, I don't think there is, strictly speaking, any reason to give it up until after transfer. I didn't drink at all during my cycle, but I basically gave up alcohol entirely not long after we started TTC (due to migraines), so I'm not sure that's necessary.

Good luck to you!

Kristen said...

Sorry the BCPs are so hard. I'm on them now too and have acne and bloating and I puked the other night which was so weird (may be totally unrelated, but I never puke).
I have taken wellbutrin in the past and it has worked wonders. Good for you for doing what you need to do...for me it was a hard decision to have to take it but I was so depressed, I really needed help and that helped.
My clinic asks that we stop alcohol/caffiene/exercise when starting stims, but every clinic is different, so I'd ask yours and go with whatever they recommend.
Good luck with this cycle! Fingers crossed for you!